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Same-Sex Marriage

This post could get muddy, but I hope I get some input from people.  

I spend a lot of time on Yahoo! Answers in the “Religion and Spirituality” section.  There are a lot of atheists, and a lot of intolerant, ignorant Christians.  One of the hottest topics to deal with is that of homosexuality.  Let me begin by stating this: I am completely against homosexuality, as the Bible defines it as a sin, therefore, I rest assured that homosexuality is a sin.  

With that said, I just want to deal with the issue of how Christians deal with homosexuality.  ChristiansYou have some people, like the Westboro Baptist Church who somehow justify having a website called GodHatesFags.com  The God I serve hates no one.  On Yahoo! Answers, I see it constantly posted by “Christians” that “Homosexuals will burn forever!” or the like.  While I believe that homosexuality is a sin and that sin separates us from God, thus they will not enter into the Kingdom of Heaven…I have to ask, “Is this the correct way to go about things?”   How do you love the sinner, and hate the sin, and yet make it clear in doing so?

What if you were at church, and you saw a homosexual couple enter your church?  They may not be displaying affection to one another, but just for the sake of this post, everyone in the church knows they live a homosexual lifestyle.  How would they be greeted and treated?  As sad as it is, I would say that in most churches, they would be rejected and shunned, and no one would want to talk to them.  Why is this?  

This is more or less me just rambling in this post, but I really have a tough time with the way that homosexuals are treated from Christians.  It is a sin.  Sin separates us from God.  I sin.  I struggle with hating stupid drivers.  I have probably said things under my breath about stupid drivers that would be classified as “sin”.  Does this put me and the homosexual on the same level?  We both have sin in our lives.  I’m going to step out on a limb here, but just in general observations, I’m pretty sure that other sins are talked about more frequently than homosexuality.  So, why does this one get so much heat?

Again, I am completely opposed to homosexuality, but how should we treat the people who live these lifestyles?  Are we even willing to reach out to the people in these lifestyles?  Where do Christians find the right to bash these people, call them an abomination, and tell them that if they don’t change their lifestyle, then they will burn forever?  We are supposed to help correct our brothers and sisters, but I am pretty sure Christlikeness is what I strive after.  I don’t really ever remember Jesus walking around screaming those things at the “outcasts” of society of the day.  In fact, He approached them, loved them so much to spend time with them, and they left changed because of Him.  

I dunno, maybe it’s just me, but it seems to me that Christianity is too busy worrying about the newest legislation regarding gay marriage and what the homosexual community is doing, that we are missing hundreds and thousands of opportunities to love these people as Jesus would love them.  I’ve never had the opportunity to come in contact with someone in the homosexual lifestyle, so I don’t know how I would react, but I have to respect the Christians who love them in spite of their sinful lifestyle.

So, for discussion time, am I right?  Am I wrong?  Is this liberal?  I’d love for some thoughts.

  1. July 10, 2008 at 7:59 pm


    I agree that some people place homosexuality in a different league than other sins, and that isn’t the way it should be. However, we have the duty to tell homosexuals and heterosexuals that they will burn forever if they don’t repent (in a loving and reasonable way). Jesus said the unless we repent, we will perish (Luke 13:5). Jesus spoke often of hell.

    Also, it’s hard to make the case for “love the sinner, hate the sin” from the Bible. Psalm 5:5-6 says, “The arrogant cannot stand in your presence; you hate all who do wrong. You destroy those who tell lies; bloodthirsty and deceitful men the LORD abhors.”

    John 3:36 says, “Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life, but whoever rejects the Son will not see life, for God’s wrath remains on him.”

    During the summer time, many cities have gay pride parades. There is no better way to show anyone love than to go warn them about where their sin is taking them, and to show them the solution.


  2. July 10, 2008 at 9:17 pm

    Well, I agree with you on what you said, cause that’s what I said. I never said that we don’t have the responsibility of telling people of the coming judgment, but my thought is the fact that too many people start with judgment and leave out love. They say “You’re going to burn in Hell forever because of your sins…” I’m all about informing people of their sin, but it just seems to me that starting with that will immediately turn them off. We are to love them, we cant skip that step.

  3. jfolsom
    July 10, 2008 at 11:53 pm

    I enjoyed reading your thoughts on this issue and have yet to come up with an exact response. Great topic!

  4. July 11, 2008 at 11:23 am

    Jesus was friendly with the woman at the well, and after he had known her for a few minutes, He pointed out that she was an adulteress. If you want to show love to people, before telling them they’re in trouble, that’s fine, but the model we have from Jesus and Peter and Paul is usually not to beat around the bush for too long.

    I think it’s safe to say, that pretty much everyone is already turned off from God (Romans 3:10-12), so don’t worry about that. If you’re worried about turning them off from yourself, then rest assured that no matter how much love you show them, trying to convince someone they deserve hell is going to turn a certain percentage of people off no matter how much they might like you. Nevertheless, God provides opportunities.

    I can assure you that if you’re friendly, people are willing to talk to you, and in the course of a five minute conversation, some people will bare their souls. I’ve found that many gay people are open to talking, and you don’t have to talk about their sexuality. We all have a host of other sins to worry about.


  5. July 11, 2008 at 12:32 pm

    I definitely agree with all you just said there, Bill. Thanks for the input.

  6. rulookingforjesus
    July 11, 2008 at 6:41 pm

    Thanks for taking on this topic. I am much like you I am against this sort of relationship in all manners. I do think we need to tell each of these people about Jesus. I try to deal with people more in a caring manner than beating them over head until they just give becasue they are tired of being beat up. We must deal with each of these people so they have a heart change and understand their actions are keeping them away from God

    Grace and Peace to you

  7. July 11, 2008 at 9:16 pm

    I totally agree Rod. In today’s society, relational evangelism seems the most effective way. If they don’t know they’re loved, then chances are they’ll shut it down quick. Thanks for the comment.

  8. Tom
    July 12, 2008 at 12:02 pm

    I am glad that many of you feel so secure with current Biblical translations.
    However, since we are stating personal opinions, I disagree and feel many of you will be greatly surprised come judgement day.
    Your blind and unquestioning “faith” borders on arrogance.

  9. July 12, 2008 at 12:36 pm

    I thank you for your comment. But, you’re not really giving me any thing to go on. You’re a bit vague on what you’re trying to say. I’d love to hear more from you to know exactly what offends you.

  10. Derek
    July 12, 2008 at 3:55 pm

    What do you mean? I think we have the wrong way of dealing with sin in general. I know at the church where I minister if a homosexual or a black man or anyone else that was “different” entered they would be mistreated or not treated at all. This concerns me greatly. We must be about changing people (including ourselves) from the inside out. Not the other way around. We must love people like Jesus did. After all, He is the best example.

  11. Corey
    July 25, 2008 at 12:27 pm

    Hey Ryan,

    So I haven’t read any of the other comments from other people because I didn’t want to respond to them, just your article, so I don’t know if I’m regurgitating what others have said or not.

    With that said, I don’t really consider your article to be liberal at all. I come from a very liberal background and understand that people have different beliefs. I think that you made a good point by stating that Christians deal with this issue very differently by not loving homosexuals the way that Jesus did. I think that many Christians think that if they accept and love homosexuals that they are, therefore, accepting that lifestyle as well. I think it is hard for some Christians to actually look at the person themselves. Instead, they would rather put a “label” on them and cast them out because it is easier. I think you are correct that Jesus would not wants us to do this and would instead want us to “help our brothers and sisters”. Anyways, I think my thoughts are just rambles and not very well stated, but even though I have different beliefs than you about homosexuality, I thought that your article was very thought provoking and I enjoyed reading and thinking about it.

  12. Bob Frankson
    September 13, 2008 at 1:08 pm


    I have read through many of your posts and find them very intriguing as I am not a believer in the Christian faith. Although I previously was a very devout Christian, I later changed my views because of irreconcilable differences, such as the fact that I am a gay man. I thoroughly appreciated the way that you, AYP, treated the subject in a much more level-headed way than I think most of the Christian community speaks and treats the gay community. I would love to tell you my story so as to give you some first-hand information about me accepting myself, a story much different than what you might expect.

    Although I know we have different beliefs, I want to thank you for expressing your views in a kind manner. I am not as keen on the idea of expressing to people what their sins are. I just think people should definitely be there for others in their time of need but not overtly expressing this sense of condescension on others. Do what you will. I just think that this would drive more people away than help situations. I know that in my younger days, I never expressed my true self to anyone and lived unhappily with a sense of self-hatred because of the fear of condemnation by my friends in the Christian faith. Now that I can be my true self, I am an entirely different person with a new outlook and excitement about life. I know you may be thinking, this will be short-lived when you will be burning in hell soon, but I just could not live in complete sadness anymore.

    Once again, I thank you for your thoughts. I am sure you know many gay people that do not inform you or allow themselves to have their innate feelings, but, when you do meet someone who is openly homosexual, I hope you treat them with the kindness that you spoke of. I do have faith in you and would be willing to talk to you about anything you have ever wondered. Thanks!

  13. September 13, 2008 at 1:31 pm

    I’m glad that you posted. I’m glad that you’ve read. Yes, we have completely different views on things, but you’re a human being created in God’s image who is supposed to be loved. All people are. Too many Christians forget this.

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